This is my 3rd birth and 2nd Hypnobabies birth. I have hired a doula (Hypnobabies one) and I have already seen how having a doula is different.
My first birth was not a pleasant one and was completely hospital oriented with induction, pitocin and a failing epidural .
My second birth was with a birthing center and midwives and with using the Hypnobabies. I have to say I was a bit naive when I went with midwives. YES! they are wonderful but they are not doulas . Their primary concern is and should be the health of mother and baby but most midwives are new to actually believing a comfortable mother-led birthing can be possible. My midwives really didn’t know what to think about Hypnobabies and were not at all able to add-to or interact with what me and my husband’s vision for our birth was even though we tried to share our vision and answer their questions. ;) They did honor and respect our wishes but were more ‘hands off’ than I was expecting and were not as ‘comfort measure’ oriented as I had read about and hoped for…every birthing center and midwife is different and has different areas of strengths.
With my third birthing experience I knew I wanted a doula but didn’t think I could afford one. Me and my husband have sacrificed for what we both believe is the best for me and our son (how often do you get to have a birth?)
Our doula has been wonderful and has even educated our birthing center midwives with a private in-service as to what to expect and how to be respectful during our birthing time.
The cost was $500 and she is Hypnobabies certified. I’m not sure if that cost is the same for Non-Hypnobabies doulas . I really feel that she has already advocated for us and she will be our biggest supporter and helper. We have not had strong family support for really any of our births so for us to just not feel ‘alone’ in our decision to birth naturally has helped with anxiety and relaxation.
And to be fair to our husbands, mine is sooooo relieved not to have to worry about food, errands or ‘getting sent out of the room to get something’ so that he can be with me….that was part of what we asked for from our doula…just help with being a third person…
I encourage you to really think about what you desire with your husband expressing his needs too. And also what you feel you need in order to feel most comfortable and then allow yourSelf to receive help in whatever way you decide.
If finances are a concern, please call and talk with a doula and financial payment I’m sure can be worked out…i.e….3 payments versus 2, etc…
Be blessed! Mattisa